Testing Times

It's been more than eight months since I wrote of the separation between my friends.It was a sad incidence which I can never forget.I thought I could move on easily.I thought it was a blessing in disguise.I was learning to adapt to the new environment,getting to know new friends and learning to forget some of the fun I had last year.Sadly,things have not gone on very smoothly.

To tell the truth,I've not really recovered from that incident.All this while,I've been trying very hard to change my way of life in school.I started making friends with new people,people from different backgrounds and a different way of living.I tried to mingle around and joke.I tried to be a good boy and complete my homework in school.I tried to keep myself busy by playing around with my pen.I tried.....

I thought I was doing well to settle in.But,just the other day,I realised that I was still missing something.I tried to look back at all the things that I've done to settle in.Looking back,none of them have really gone my way.I did make new friends,but they still don't really do the type of things that I used to do with my friends last year.One group of friends like to study and do their homework when the teacher is absent.Another group talk mostly about computer games.Another group talk about wrestling.I tried to mix in but I gave up after sometime because I felt left out.I wasn't really into their topics of discussion.

Talking about joking......you can't joke when there's no audience.Last year,when Tim,Eong Wei,Teju,Thaven and I sat together and talked,everything we said would be a joke.We would laugh till we could laugh no more.Our other friends used to look at us in a weird manner.But,that didn't bother us even a little.This time around,I feel that some of my classmates find it very hard to catch up on my jokes.Don't even ask about the bookworms.

So,I was left with only one thing,that is to be a bookworm like my classmates.I started completing my homework in class.I was doing fine with completing homework till the one day that I started to think of my old friends.I lost my interest in completing my homework.After that,I spent a lot of time thinking of my past whenever the teacher was not in class.I'm quite sure my friends would have noticed me staring blankly out of the windows.

It's been 8 months now,and I've come to realise that I have to get used to any situation.I always wonder how it would be if I had a similar environment when I'm out of school.I came to a quick conclusion that I have to get used to it.I have to make use of the few moments of joy that I get with my friends.Just a couple of days ago,my friends and I were playing a childish game in class.I got great satisfaction after playing that game.

I know that I'm 16 and I should be matured by now.But,I'm not ready to be a matured person.I still want to enjoy my childish ways as long as I'm in school.After all,you can't really expect to be a childish person once your are done schooling......I mean no one expects you to be so.I have about more than a year left to be in school.It's not very long.So.....I've made up my mind to embark on a new journey to look for all those little happy moments as much as I can......I mean the childish ones.......